Sometimes I go places.
Just for a day.
Like Alaska. It’s foreign. You need a passport to get there. Impressed?
Don’t be, it’s two hours away.
By slow grey minivan.
How did we spend those two hours you ask? Why, watching Bakugan of course. What else would we do. Look at the scenery?
No, I don’t think so. I mean look at the glare from the window. Might as well just abandon looking out of them. It’s as though someone has gone and wiped their greasy hands all the way down my gorgeous view.
I think I know that “someone”.
That someone may have also been the same someone who spent the second half of the drive pointing out how many zombies they could see with their borrowed binoculars. That someone was arguably provoked by his sister who, in her defense, was merely preparing him for the impending zombie apocalypse/rapture that was said to occur the following day.
That someone also had a thing for waterfalls.
In fact, not a SINGLE waterfall went by un-announced.
Any other conversation (or train of thought) had to be put on hold if there was a waterfall.
“Daddy, you have to be careful when – WATERFALL! – you – WATERFALL! – ….. um… when – WATERFALL! – when you’re – WATERFALL! -… when – WATERFALL!- when – WATERFALL! – um…”
Eventually, after many suspected waterfall provoked Turrets attacks, his daddy was warned not to drive fast around corners.
There is no exaggeration in the above quote, in fact, there were significantly more ticks than those written.
It’s ok, we all have issues.
I mean, another someone, not naming names, decided it would be a good idea to pack an entire laundry hamper (in addition to a large backpack) for a 24 hour trip.
That is clearly not my food.
This is my food. mwahahah.
On to more interesting things. We got two rooms at a quaint and wicked B & B for the price of one. Score.
This meant that after jogging around, climbing over fences that ought not to be climbed over, and sitting in the extra chilly ocean breeze, we were welcomed “home” to this.
It was cute.
Cute, I’m told, is a girl word. We use it to describe inanimate objects in ways that men will never understand. But come on. It was cute. How else do you describe it? Cute is like a smart car, or a vintage doily, or an old-timey B & B, or a floral little girl’s dress, or a tea party, or glasses. Maybe there’s a little over-use. Whatever.
However Ladies, if you do hear a man refer to something other than a puppy or a baby as cute, do not ask him on a date. He may just not be that into you. You’ve been forewarned.
Speaking of guys, I found something among the boats in the harbour.
No, not my foot.
Creepy, this stranger was taking a picture of me. Who does that.
Backtracking.. did I forget to tell you that there was breakfast involved in our B & B stay? Duh. I like food.
Oh and were we talking about puppies earlier?
This is Sammy.
As a rule, I’m not a “little dog” person. I’ve always liked my dogs to exceed football size, that way when they bark, I’m not tempted to kick them.
Sammy is the exception to the rule. I met him in Skagway. He doesn’t bark.
He cuddles. And is soft. And even kind of smells nice. I didn’t want to say goodbye.
Unfortunately, I had to. Other plans were calling.
M has a friend named B. B is awesome. Her name starts with B. that’s awesome.
B has a sister, she is also awesome.
B also likes to run.
So does M, even though he started off on a bike. For his sake we’ll pretend he didn’t have a head start.
M and B (notice I don’t refer to B first for fear of BM… ya.. nvm) took to the trails together, adults in tow.
It soon became a foot race.
Some people aren’t happy unless they are in the lead.
They use dehydration as an excuse.
They sometimes use “getting distracted by things to climb” as an excuse too.
But then they’re off again.
Why wasn’t I in the lead?
I got distracted by pretty things.
And outhouses. Such a cute outhouse.
Here’s where the trouble began. B was in the lead and, when reaching a fork, took off to the right.
M was adamant on turning left.
The rest of the hikers chose B’s path.
M was distraught. Pay close attention to facial expressions.
All was eventually well.
We had the occasional pit stop.
And once in a while we would reach an impasse. This particular one was a challenge. As M said “How am I supposed to get around the quicksand?”. He eventually took the trail that went around “the quicksand” (/lake)… like everyone else.
Some people decided they would hold hands… or.. er.. bum. ew. Why did I have to catch that?
And I’m not going to try to explain this. I apologize, B, for including you in this, clearly against your will.
As you will notice, M is a very graceful walker. Reminiscent of Ballet is it not? Or knock knees. Not sure which.
He also blends in very well with his surroundings.
Note: B did not get thirsty until an hour after M. Sorry M.
In his rage, he attempted to take down an evergreen.
Note #2: Do not look up at the needles when shaking an evergreen. They will inevitably attack your eyeball. Your sister will be nice, and not take a picture of it.
Then she will jump off a rock into water of glacial temperatures, in good company.
Pay close attention to facial expressions, once again.
Apparently, that facial expression really sold the whole jumping into an icy lake thing. M was so going to do it.
And for a panicked millisecond, he did. And then he was back on the edge. And then, while shivering, he fell back into the water (un-pictured). And then he was back on the edge.
M and I both suffered injuries from the ordeal. Mine was clearly fatal. M thought it was cool.
At least it wasn’t inflicted by one of these beauties. Devil’s Club. Aptly named, science. Aptly named.
Finally, we skipped on back to town… again somehow more damp than we began. It seems to be a tradition amongst our outings.
My camera died. I did not get to show you the rest of our lovely day. We found a Sarah Palin store. We ate freshly caught shrimp (I don’t even care for shrimp, and this was good, mysterious!) drenched in garlic butter (mystery solved.). I cuddled a fluffy canine. We stuffed our faces with indian food. We watched Bakugan aaaaaaaaall the way home.
Yes the same episode that we watched on the way down. Lower your expectations please.